Investment Wellness + Beauty Tools I Love

Working from home has always been the norm for me being self employed, but doing just about everything else at home this past 18 months has, like for us all, become slightly tiresome + a little repetitive. I’m definitely not complaining one bit as it’s very much a first-world problem (I’m in no way discounting how blessed I am to have somewhere safe to call home) but I guess it had become more + more important to ensure we’d been doing all the nice little things possible to make the whole experience a little brighter + lighter. While I’m not exactly the girl who has a million things in my social diary as lockdown slowly lifts - book me dinner with friends + get me home by 11 + I’m a happy lady. Apart from restaurants + cute weekend brunches though, one thing I’m definitely excited to have back in our lives is the ability to book in for a facial (I literally booked in with my facialist on her first day back) or a major ‘beat-the-crap-out-of-those-shoulder-knots” massage.. now that’s what I call LIT!! Totally my jam.

However, in spending so much time at home through it all, it’s been pretty cool to see what we CAN do in terms of our beauty routines + what treatments, I for one, will definitely continue to enjoy at home which includes some of the beauty tools I’ve invested in + used + truly love. Here today I’m talking about the investment beauty + wellness tools that, if you’re in the market for something new or uplifting, I absolutely recommend.

H I G H E R D O S E S A U N A B L A N K E T

I’d been wanting to try the Higher Dose at-home Sauna Blanket for a while + in December I took the leap to buy it. It’s basically a sleeping bag/blanket that acts as a sauna, the benefits of which are on par with an in-person session in an infrared sauna. I’m someone who LOVES to get a good sweat on, whether working out or doing Bikram (I get the reddest red face of.all.time - I’m an over-heater if ever you met one). I love the feeling of toxic release. It feels like a tonic to me. So with Higher Dose, it’s super simple, all you do is set up where you want to do it (always ensuring the wire isn’t under the blanket), let it heat for 10 minutes + then enjoy the time to relax, read (if you’re keeping your arms out of the blanket itself), watch a movie or, like I sometimes do, lay in the dark with a chic R O A D S candle lit + listen to a meditation // audiobook // podcast.

The benefits of Higher Dose are pretty incredible + as I’m not a healthcare professional of any sort, I share only my own experience - for me it’s been things like better sleep, increased mood + a lift in my energy levels as I find the time I spend in the blanket entirely relaxing that I absolutely see a boost in my energy the day after which is of course helped by the better sleep the blanket encourages.

SHOP at HIGHERDOSE.COM + use my personalised discount code HAUTE75 for $/€75 off your purchase..

M A N U C U R I S T

Next up is a new best friend to my nails. Manucurist is the BOMB!! I love it. I feel clean + fresh when I have my nails done + I’d been missed having the luxury of a nice manicure. However, since I tried Manucurist I’m all about my at-home DIY job. It’s super quick, so effective + fabulously glossy with no mess. It takes just about 8 minutes in total too so it’s perfect for while I’m on a (non-video) call or sitting at my desk listening to something. You can read all about it at Manucurist.com but basically it’s the first ‘clean’ non-toxic gel polish on the market so it’s also a super healthy option for your nails + I’ve been using it for a few months now + can attest to the fact that it doesn’t peel any layers of your nails or leave you with chipped varnish, in fact it lasts about 10 days; no joke.

SHOP at M A N U R C U R I S T . C O M

C E L L U M A

Like many big investment pieces, I do a lot of research into which one I really want to go with, always staying clear of or at least being aware of the many fads that storm their way through IG + my at-home LED ‘mask’ was definitely one I was super cautious about. With so many on the market I was unsure which weren’t just a trend + I also really wanted one that was FDA approved (be aware that most aren’t). So, as with all things skin related I asked my facialist Dawn, the founder of Floraison, which mask she would recommend. Enter Celluma Face LED. This isn’t a traditional ‘mask’ so-to-speak - not like the ones you typically see on IG these days, but rather a wrap which, with it’s flexibility means it can actually be used on many parts of the body like arms, legs, or the chest + neck area. LED light therapy has been around for a long time but in recent years, you’ve most likely seen how it’s been zapped up by the beauty industry + made into a highly commercial trend of sorts. However, what isn’t a quick trend is the medical grade technology of Celluma’s scientifically proven ability to provide the compromised cells in our skin the opportunity for tissue repair, an increase in micro-circulation + decreased inflammation which together, support the skin in it’s natural ability to look + feel healthy. And who’s not into that. With two settings, the Celluma is multifaceted + allows for the treatment of wrinkles + acne at a more topical level, while at a more muscular level, the management of pain + deeper healing. The Celluma isn’t just any ‘mask’, it’s a medical grade experience at home.

If you’ve been toying with the idea of an at-home LED mask, I absolutely recommend the Celluma as a brand + would propose you speak with Dawn about it directly if you’re considering investing.

SHOP at F L O R A I S O N . I E

D E R M A F L A S H

Working as an effective exfoliation procedure, dermaplaning is one of the hot topics on the agenda of beauty seekers and aestheticians alike. Short + sweet, the procedure is very simple with endless results. DERMAFLASH allows for the ability to do derma planing at home safely; derma planing consists of a sterile surgical blade which gently “shaves” off the surface of the skin in order to remove all excess dead skin + peach fuzz hair around the face. 

Again another thing I love to get done in normal times when getting a facial, it was suddenly no longer an option during lockdown so I thought I’d try this + I’ve not looked back. It’s not for everyone but I love the results. So easy to use + with very little way to do it ‘wrong’ (make sure to watch the videos on the Dermaflash website here though to ensure full safety) or harm your skin, it’s a really good investment if you’re looking to continue your dermaplaning journey at home. I love it.

SHOP at C U L T B E A U T Y . C O M

F A C E G Y M P R O T O O L

I’ve had my FaceGym Pro Tool for a long time now + absolutely love it.

The whole idea behind FaceGym is genius. It’s that, just like we workout our bodies, so should we approach the muscles in our face the same way. It was founded by Inge Theron who once worked for the Financial Times as one of their Wellness, Beauty + Spa writers where she shared her tried + tested reviews of endless amounts of beauty + wellness retreats, procedures + treatments in her column, ‘Chronicles of a Spa Junkie’ until one particular face-lifting procedure went wrong + left her house bound. She then sought to find the most organic way of working-out + lifting the face + so, FaceGym was born.

The brand now has 13 studios across the UK + US territories + is honestly such a fun way to get a facial in when you can get to a physical location.. However when at home or if you can’t get to one in person, their FaceGym Pro Tool, created in partnership with Xtreem Pulse is a powerful + non-invasive addition to any any-home skincare routine; it simply uses electrical pulses to stimulate your muscles just like we do our body when we workout. I use mine several days or nights a week alongside my Gua Sha routine + genuinely adore it for taking the tightening + toning in the face to another level. I see + feel a real difference with this in my weekly routine.

SHOP at F A C E G Y M . C O M

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Designer Spotlight; Eliurpí

ELIURPÍ is a hat lovers everything come to life. An aesthetic addict’s fantasy made real in the everyday. And perhaps quite fitting to this summer’s heightened desires (if not urgency) to do nothing but sit by a pool in the heat, it’s exactly the reason you book a flight to the South of France or the Amalfi Coast right now so you can revel in the elegance of a life lived ELIURPÍ style. With a vision to ensure the romanticism of artisanal craftsmanship continued to be celebrated + respected at it’s core, ELIURPÍ was founded in 2010 by designer Elisabet Urpi + her partner + photographer Nacho Umpiérrez, ELIURPÍ who began with a small studio in Carrer de Petritxol, Barcelona + have grown to be one of those brands that, for those who know.. well IKYK, amirite?

Creatively, the brand is of genius standards having grown slowly but steadily over the past decade with decidedly brilliant collaborations with the likes of William Morris fabrics + a collection with Tara Jarmon. Their first store opened in Barcelona in 2013 with a slew of achievements, that for a small, considered brand only come for those who truly have it. Stockists include Browns, Harrods, Land Crawford Shanghai + Hong Kong, Ilum in Copenhagen, not forgetting many others across Japan, Russia, Greece, France, Italy + Indonesia.

With it’s origins in millinery - the brand has since become more accessories focused with bags now a part of the collections - each piece is created to shield the wearer from the sun yet designed to attract attention, it seems obvious to say that a core value for the brand might be that the wider the brim the more distinctive the statement; something I am all about when it comes to an investment hat of this calibre. And for the first time, this season sees the brand design a collection of dresses - that for those who love to feel wow’d + wow, well there’s little else to say, let’s let ELIURPÍ do the talking. See the SS/21 collection below.

Shop at E L I U R P Í . C O M

ALL IMAGES VIA ELIURPI

Sarah Hoover's NYC Hotlist

As if we needed more reason to spend time in NYC but hey, here’s the city’s coolest lady’s hotlist of the city’s best places for just about every situation. Welcome to Sarah Hoover’s New York City favourites:

Way to spend a day alone? // Barrys Bootcamp, pedicure, museum wandering!

Best cocktail spot? // The Crosby Hotel Bar

Breakfast? // Balthazar

Brunch? // American Bar

Dinner? // Milos

Cocktail? // Vodka martini up with extra olives on the side

Date night spot? // Jua 

Girls night on the town? // Indochine forever

Museum? // The Met, Centre Pompidou, the Prado

Gallery? // Gagosian! But so many others, too. Ropac, Paula Cooper, Salon94, Spruth Magers

Artist? // Cecily Brown

Exercise class? // The Limit Fit, Barrys Bootcamp

Local fashion designer? // Markarian

Hotel? // The Carlyle

Hidden gem? // My amazing neighborhood pizza spot, Emporio

Weekend escape? // Parrot Cay

To find out more about Sarah, read the HSF x Sarah Hoover Interview here

Dervla Louli Musgrave, Founder of Compare Retreats

As the founder + Editor-in-chief of CompareRetreats.com, a luxury well-being retreat discovery platform for the world’s leading wellness destinations, Dervla Louli Musgrave is a lady on a mission to bring much needed transparency to the wellness travel industry. With her impeccable style + otherworldly travels the Irish-born, Hong Kong based entrepreneur has created not only her dream job but a much needed safe, reliable + those seeking their escape + the next step on their inward journey.

Here Dervla speaks about her career + shifting gears, her own wellness routines + what’s next on her list once international travel resumes..

HSF - Dervla, firstly if you would, tell us a little about yourself + how have you been over the past year of crazy changes through the pandemic?

DLM - I’m an Egyptian Irish wellness travel entrepreneur + lifestyle editor based between Hong Kong + Ireland. I’ve worked for Tatler, contribute to Vogue + love geeking out about digital + print content creation. I founded CompareRetreats.com in 2017 to help people find + book the best tried, tested + trusted wellness retreats around the world + have three gorgeous rescue puppies Roxy, Clive + Chloé.

My initial reaction to the pandemic was to stress bake + I started a botanical baking business in Hong Kong. Once the initial shock wore off I made important + difficult business decisions to ensure CompareRetreats.com would survive the pandemic + thrive once travel resumes. I came to Ireland for Christmas to see my parents + have been here ever since, it’s been special to have so much time at home with family + friends.

HSF - What originally attracted you to Hong Kong as a city?

DLM - It’s small, dense, easy to navigate + is extremely dynamic + fast. I had just graduated from Trinity with a masters of finance + wanted to work for HSBC in Hong Kong but ended up pursuing publishing once I arrived. It’s a vibrant city full of hikes, beaches, secret islands + a perfect hub from which to explore Asia. I love the mix of high rises, markets, positive people + the incredible food scene.

HSF - Prior to founding Compare Retreats, you had an inspiring career in publishing - what lessons did you take with you from that time?

DLM - In my opinion content now has to work harder than ever so keep that in mind when you’re creating it. Plan out how you can edit it for social, digital + print before you put pen to paper or pick up a camera. I think listening to feedback, constantly learning new skills + knowing when to move on if you’ve stopped learning are three useful lessons.

HSF - For those new to it’s concept, explain exactly what Compare Retreats is as a platform + what it offers wellness seekers..

DLM - CompareRetreats.com is a bible of the best five star wellness + fitness retreats around the world. Less than 1% of wellness retreats worldwide meet the criteria + my approach is quality over quantity. We offer exclusive benefits via our travel concierge + booking portal + in depth reviews by certified health + fitness professionals. The retreat collection + our clientele are global so we can always find a retreat that suits someone whether that’s a sleep retreat in Thailand, an Ayurveda getaway in India or a spa break in Ireland. I’ve personally vetted most of the retreats + each one offers something very special. We even have a wellness retreat in the wild for animal + nature lovers.

HSF - What are some of the things that must be present, values so to speak, when you choose a retreat to add to the platforms exclusive collection?

DLM - Each property in the collection is so unique so there’s no set criteria per se but in general it must be beautiful + comfortable with excellent wellness experts, customer service + facilities. The retreat programmes must be transformative too.

HSF - What has been the retreat you’ve most loved?

DLM - There are too many to count but Aro Ha, COMO Shambhala Estate, Amanoi, Nihi Sumba, Royal Mansour + Joali are some standout spots.

HSF - And the one highest on your bucket list?

DLM - I was supposed to go to India in 2020 but life had other plans so Vana + Ananda are both high on my list.

HSF - As a tech + wellness entrepreneur, how do you see the industry changing due to COVID; where do you see things settling for both retreat hosts + wellness lovers in search of their bliss..

DLM - I think it will come back stronger than ever, we just need to be patient. I do see a huge increase in travel insurance sales, reliance on independent travel experts + longer stays on the horizon. We have received enquiries every day since COVID hit so the demand is there + as soon as it’s safe to send our clients away they’ll be running to retreats.

HSF - In being your own boss, how do you manage a work/life balance? It can be all consuming at times, especially, I find, when we love what we do so much + it doesn’t feel like work..

DLM - I have an amazing small team who help me get through a lot of the work that comes with running CompareRetreats.com + I love writing + creating content so much it’s not work per se because it’s second nature to me now. I think the reason we work for ourselves is because we find joy in building our own dreams instead of someone else’s. So I would say I don’t balance my work and my life, I just go with the flow.

HSF - What does a day in your life look like typically?

DLM - I naturally wake up at around 7 or 8 do some daily affirmations in bed, kiss my husband, tell my dogs how wonderful they are, then some water + coffee and go outside for a stroll if it’s a nice day while checking emails, booking enquiries, Instagram or I’ll do a PT session with a trainer. I’m not into breakfast so I usually have some eggs + fruit around midday + do most conference calls, Zooms + meetings in the afternoon. You’ll then probably catch me scrolling through Net-a-Porter trying to navigate what to wear through Ireland’s ever changing temperatures before catching up with friends. I’m loving Sporty & Rich tracksuits + anything cosy by Varley at the moment. Most of my writing for publishing clients happens at night while I listen to the extended version of Intro by The XX on repeat. Playing the same track when I need to write tells my brain it’s work mode. Then it’s time for my evening skincare routine which includes Skinceuticals and Dr. Lara Devgan serums, Augustinus Bader cream, Sarah Chapman’s oil, Amanda Harrington tan + some Gua Sha massage. My skin changed in my thirties + I’m now vigilant about preventing acne + pigmentation. I put on some Olivia Von Halle pyjamas, journal affirmations Sonia Samtani has given me that month + put on a SLIP mask before reading a book + lights out.

HSF - Hopefully we’ll get back to traveling at some point in the near future.. what are some of your top tips to remain balanced when traveling?

DLM - Allow yourself to let loose + have fun (you’re on a holiday after all!) + just make sure to keep on top of your three or four most important wellness habits. For me that means staying hydrated, only eating when I’m hungry, getting enough sleep + getting outdoors in nature for a walk on a daily basis if I can.

If you’re on a wellness retreat your day will be laid out so just try to let your mind rest while the experts take you through your paces. If you feel a resistance towards the regime you’re on breathe through it + remember positive change is always uncomfortable but worth it. Look at a retreat like a mini hero journey with lessons to teach you about yourself along the way. If you’re resisting eliminating coffee for example it’s because you’re probably too dependant or attached to it, be gentle + kind with yourself at all times.

HSF - What will we always find in your check-in // hand luggage?

DLM - Clarins Rose Hip lip balm, some cashmere, BOSE noise-cancelling headphones, Chanel card holder, Smythson notebook, a Maison Michel sun hat if I’m going somewhere warm, my Macbook + Kindle. In my dreams my poodle would be in there too.

HSF - When not participating at an in-person retreat, how do you value wellness in your everyday life?

DLM - I think wellness is an inside job that you can get outside help for but you need to invest time + effort into it. I work on my body, mind + spirit a little bit every day + from what I’ve learned it all begins with loving yourself so that everyone around you gets the best version of you.

HSF - I call them my daily positive practices, those things you know you just simply aren’t your full self when you skip them. Do you have daily rituals do you swear by?

DLM - Here’s my daily wellness list that Sonia Samtani helped me develop. It used to be very military + now it’s a lot softer which is great. Be Happy, Have Fun, Eat Protein, Move, Journal, Rest. I love this list + it works for me because they’re invitations not orders.

HSF - We connected recently through DM’s on Instagram when I shared about my experience with an eating disorder. I consider those who have recovered to have a strength so deep it makes you somewhat unbreakable once you’re through it. How has your own experience with an eating disorder + recovering from it played a part in shaping you as a person, both personally + professionally?

DLM - For most of my teenage + adult life I struggled with unhealthy eating patterns + beliefs around food. It wasn’t until recently with help from two experts Muk and Sonia that I was able to get better physically + mentally. I’ve become more patient, hardworking + committed as a result both personally + professionally.

HSF - Can you share, if you’re comfortable, what tools you have found helpful in your journey back to health?

DLM - A great therapist, Sonia specialises in inner child healing, hypnotherapy, NLP + so much more. Hypnotherapy is my favourite form of ‘travel’ these days, even if it is into my own subconscious. A positive, fun, knowledgeable + experienced coach to help you with nutrition, my trainer Muk is the best. I journal affirmations at night, say them to myself in the morning + sometimes play them in the car or while I’m walking. Realising there is no quick fix, that it is daily work and that you’re worth putting time and effort into are great realisations. Headspace for meditations, an Apple Watch to make step tracking fun + MyFitnessPal for macro counting are in my arsenal.

HSF - In your own experience, at what point did you come to terms with the fact you needed to make recovery a priority?

DLM - When we decided we wanted to start a family.

HSF - For anyone on the fence or frightened to commit fully to their wellbeing, what would you say?

DLM - Spending time improving your body, mind + spirit is the greatest investment you’ll ever make. You’re worth it.

HSF - What freedoms has your own commitment afforded you?

DLM - I’m so much kinder to myself + enjoy life much more, my cortisol levels have dropped, my relationships have improved + I’m just much happier + lighter.

HSF - Thank you Dervla, I relate to this so much. On a lighter note, what is the last book you enjoyed?

DLM - American Dirt

HSF - And movie?

DLM - Promising Young Woman

HSF - Documentary?

DLM - Social Dilemma

HSF - TV show?

DLM - Lupin

HSF - Podcast?

DLM - The Good Glow episode with Claire Moore

HSF - What are some of your unfulfilled ambitions?

DLM - I’d like to publish a book of some kind one day

HSF - And lastly, Dervla, what is next for you + Compare Retreats?

DLM - We’re adding the best luxury wellness retreats + spa breaks in Ireland + the UK to the collection

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Follow Dervla @dervlalouli // Book your next wellness retreat at CompareRetreats.com

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Sarah Hoover, Director at Gagosian; The Interview

Sarah Hoover, a director at Gagosian since 2007 - one of the world’s most influential contemporary art galleries, is an art dealer, based in New York City. With a wonderfully sarcastic sense of humour you can’t help but fall for Hoover’s genius portrayal of her own life though her fabulously unfiltered Instagram account @sarahhoov. As she navigates the world with her son Guy + husband Tom Sachs, Hoover is a force to be reckoned with. Defying any roles society works hard to box us into as women, her strong + empowered storytelling conveys a sense of the badass woman she is, one that’s intellectually interested + interesting, hilarious + with just the right amount of self-deprecating humour she brings it all together in her breathtaking + impossibly beautiful collection of outfits + Chanel filled wardrobe.

Here she chats style philosophy, social media + daily routines..

HSF - What does a day in the life of Sarah Hoover look like?

SH - Different now than pre pandemic! I like to work out first thing, then shower + take time getting ready. Spend an hour or so hanging out with my son in the morning before he goes to school, then do correspondence + zoom calls + get them out of the way before lunch. I need a big chunk of time in the afternoons to write—three hours or so, half of which I waste procrastinating + suffering from extreme imposter syndrome, half of which I actually accomplish things. And then I like to hang out with my son between his dinner + bed time. He’s my favorite person. At night I have dinner with my husband most nights, + our best couple friends about half the time. I reserve at least one night a week for girlfriends—I’d reserve them all for girlfriends if I could!

HSF - It’s safe to say your style is a D R E A M. What is your perfect outfit? Like what makes you feel your best?

SH - I feel my best in short skirts + dresses because I like when my legs feel free! I hate being overly hot + as you may know I am an extreme overheater which I love to talk about constantly. It’s pretty sexy.

HSF - On the note of personal style, you’re the Queen of “when art + fashion collides” what is your style philosophy / how do you build out your wardrobe?

SH - My style philosophy is that trends don’t matter + you should wear things that make you feel comfortable + happy. I’ve always loved pastels + sparkles + matching looks. I indulge it! At night I love to feel sexy + wear all black, lots of leather + fitted looks, and I indulge that too. I’m not sure either vibe is “on trend” but I don’t really care.

HSF - Where do you find yourself most inspired? And by whom?

SH - When I’m reading really good fiction + really good poetry. Specifically Sylvia Plath, TS Elliot, Hemingway. I also love to see museum shows of beautiful + radical art.

HSF - To what do you attribute your success thus far?

SH - So much luck + good fortune that I don’t deserve. But also, trying to treat everyone with grace + kindness + going above and beyond with every task.

HSF - What upcoming exhibitions or emerging artists are currently catching your attention in terms of art?

SH - Adriana Varejao at Gagosian West 21st street will be beautiful!

HSF - And in fashion?

SH - Christopher John Rogers + his use of color. Rodarte + how they follow their imagination + inspirations.

HSF - Favourite established designer?

SH - Chanel

HSF - And someone more emerging?

SH - Markarian + Prabal Gurung

HSF - You’re one of the coolest people to follow on Instagram as a Mum, style icon + career lady. Your sharp sense of humour + incredibly articulate + smart manner defies the fatigued + repetitive nature of so many accounts these days. How do you switch off though? Do you find the pull of social media + always being turned on a challenge? Where do you find balance in doing it all?

SH - I definitely find the pull of social media to be hard to resist! But I think being mindful of doing things that bring true joy + inspiration, not things that are just rote habit, is super important—so if I’m just looking at social media + absorbing it but not creating content + creating thought expression that is fulfilling for me, that’s when it’s time to lock my phone away.

HSF - Do you have a morning + evening routine? Anything that you do every day without fail?

SH - I write in my journal first thing when I wake up. Sometimes it’s for five minutes, sometimes it’s for thirty, but I try to do it first thing every day. And I’m really into oral hygiene.

HSF - What was the last book you enjoyed?

SH - The Margot Affair and Stephanie Danler’s memoir, Stray, which is beyond beautiful writing

HSF - And film / TV show?

SH - I love Succession + can’t wait for it to come back. 

HSF - What are some of your unfulfilled ambitions?

SH - I want to write + publish lots more, both academic + fiction

HSF - And lastly Sarah, what’s next for you?

SH - I wrote a book last year that I hope will be published in 2022!

Follow Sarah via Instagram // @sarahhoov

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The Weekend Edit 01

The P O D C A S T // Fake Heiress. A partially dramatised podcast about notorious 'fake heiress' Anna Sorokin, about which I read the book: My Best Friend Anna. This is a 6 part series with 30 minute episodes.

The A R T I C L E // The Fall of Armie Hammer: A Family Saga of Sex, Money, Drugs, + Betrayal

The M O V I E // A Promising Young Woman with Carey Mulligan - I watched this this week + it is SUCH an important + brilliant movie

The B O O K // Klara + The Sun by Kazou Ishiguro. I am currently this, you can find my April book list HERE

The P L A Y L I S T // Butter. The perfect, soulful chill to have on in the background as you get your weekend on.

The B R A N D // Jennifer Chamandi. London based shoe designer Jennifer Chamandi is the ultimate in shoe chic

The A C C O U N T to follow // The Title. I’m getting married this year so this for me, is my total vibe. The perfect destination for

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Danni Dance of The-Hosta, The Interview

Based in the UK, Danni Dance is the founder + director of - T H E - H O S T A . C O M. Here Danni shares with us her experience + expertise in the luxury market, from designer to entrepreneur as she shines a light on the importance of smart + considered purchasing + how her time in the product development sector led her to set up her own business + brand..

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HSF - Danni, tell us about your career to date, as a designer + entrepreneur..

DD - I worked for over 15 years as a bag Product Developer for brands such as COS, Hunter + Nanushka. Partnering with designers to establish Bag + Accessory collections for brands, manufacturing in Italy, Turkey + Vietnam. I loved my job + have met some of my closest friends during my career. I have so many amazing memories, a lot of travel, not only to the factories but also visiting Tokyo, NYC, Stockholm regularly for inspiration. I didn’t go to University, going straight into working for COS as the Accessory Buying Assistant when I was 21 years old, that was 15 years ago. When I joined COS it was pre launch + we didn’t even have a name. I learnt so much during that time. I have always collected vintage bags + had built up a network of specialist vintage dealers. When lockdown hit it made me pause + reassess. I was finding the constant need for newness in the fashion industry exhausting + unsustainable, the industry had gone from making two collections a year (S/S + A/W) to constant new drops. I also saw first hand the sustainability + ethical issues in the industry + wanted to make a change. I had always wanted to start my own business, so I set up The Hosta last year. 

HSF - You’ve sold a few of my own pieces through your service which worked a treat + I’ve also purchased one of my own bucket list bags from you recently, but explain, if you would for those who aren’t familiar with the concept of The Hosta, what exactly it is you do..

DD - I sell vintage + preowned bags via the website T H E - H O S T A . C O M. It is a curated collection of bags that will stand the test of time. There are some great market places to buy vintage + second hand goods, such as Vestiaire Collective, but sometimes the choice is overwhelming + you can spend hours searching, plus you can wait for weeks for items to be delivered. All of our stock is available for immediate shipping, in the UK we ship via DHL next day delivery. I buy my stock from specialist dealers worldwide + also offer consignment. Consignment means that you can sell your bags with us for a low set fee of 30%. We pay for the collection of your bag + obviously photograph it, market + then if it’s not sold we return the bag to you free of charge.

HSF - How do you oversee the acquiring of new pieces + of course the authentication process of each?

DD - Prior to listing any items for sale on T H E - H O S T A . C O M, each of our bags undergo a detailed authentication process; this includes methodically inspecting each + every element of the bag including the hardware, stitching, material, symmetry, label, code, stamp + overall craftsmanship. We maintain an extremely high bar to verify each of our pieces as legitimate, comparing what we find with the respective designer’s established standards. If, throughout this process, we identify that part of a bags has been repaired, modified or replaced (+ is no longer original), then this will be noted in the product description. We have zero tolerance for inauthentic items. I have worked with factories in Italy that make for most of the brands that I sell. So I know instinctively what to look out for - from the smallest details such as choice of threads + stitch count, to linings + the way the bag has been constructed. 

HSF - What inspired you to develop the brand?

DD - Lockdown forced me to pause + I realised I was physically + mentally exhausted. I was on a flight every other week and commuting from Sussex to London when in the UK. My son was about to start school + I wanted to be more present. I saved up to buy my first 10 bags + then it has just grown from there. I built the website myself, shoot all of the bags in a light box + then photograph each one on myself using tripods. This has enabled me to keep costs low so that I can focus on building stock. I am now up to 80 bags in stock, investing all profits back into the business. 

HSF - What made you chose this over designing your own collection - especially with so much time in bag development over your career?

DD - The fashion industry is almost completely linear, with large amounts of non-renewable resources used to produce products that ultimately end in landfill or incineration. Disposable fashion puts significant pressure on non-renewable + threatened resources, especially water, as well as producing large quantifies of waste, a large degree of which, again, ends up in landfill or for incineration. I didn’t want to add to this + I saw first hand the financial cost of developing collections + I didn’t have the financial backing to be able to do that properly. 

HSF - Famously, Chanel classics tend to increase about 3% year on year in value.. what other specific bags or brands tend to hold the most value over time?

DD - Chanel + Hermes are most definitely the brands to invest in. Always pick materials that last (leather) + neutral colours (black the most popular). The no brainer is always the Chanel Classic Double Flap, especially the earlier styles with 24k gold plated hardware. 

HSF - Obviously sustainability is such an important aspect of your brand, how do you maintain a standard of eco-friendly principles + sustainability in the day-to-day running of the business? 

DD - Our commitment extends beyond just the circular economy, + as part of our mission to further the cause of sustainability, we dispatch all of our orders in plastic free packaging made from recycled materials. This packaging can also be fully recycled. We don’t discount or participate in Black Friday sales. Fundamentally we believe that discounting is unsustainable as it encourages the purchase of items that people don’t need, we believe that this excessive consumption + overproduction significantly contributes to climate change. Instead, we price each of our items fairly, encouraging our customers to shop responsibly. We have fully offset our carbon footprint, including the footprint of the orders we dispatch + the full operation, through the planting of trees + contributions to climate crisis solutions via the company Ecologi.

HSF - Like you Danni, I’m a huge believer in buying better - investing in things that last + that stand the test of time - what advice would you give to anyone wanting to move toward a more sustainable wardrobe in general?

DD - Absolutely, if you can buy less + buy better. Not everyone can afford to do so though, so if on a budget then there are some great market places for second hand clothing. Ebay and Depop are perfect for this. I have a one in one out rule. So if I need or want something new then I will first sell an item from my wardrobe. 

HSF - If you were to curate the perfect bag wardrobe for a client, what would be in it? Of course taking into account their specific style preferences, focusing more on the types of bags..

DD - Good question! A Prada nylon tote or hobo for everyday, I used a Vintage Prada nylon hobo as my nappy bag as is the perfect chuck it all, wipe down bag that I still use today now that my son has grown up. Plus they come in loads of colours. A small crossbody bag for days that you need to be handsfree + can afford to carry less, the Phoebe Philo Céline trio would be ideal.  A summer tote - Loewe basket bag would be my ideal here, needs to fit a towel + summer essentials. Then one classic bag - such as the double flap Chanel - this bag can equally be worn as an evening bag or to dress up jeans. 

HSF - Do you source specific items for customers or do you just select what becomes available on the site?

DD - Yes we can source specific styles for sure, just let us know what you are after + your budget and we can keep an eye out for you. 

HSF - Your style + aesthetics on Instagram are stunning - so dreamy. Where are you most inspired + with/by whom?

DD - Thank you, that is very kind. I am very inspired at the moment by gardening + gardeners. I moved out of London 3 years ago + returned back to the countryside + have loved every minute. I want to turn my garden into a prairie style garden + have become obsessed. I have loved visiting all of the local plant nurseries + meeting the gardeners. I have found that a lot of these people are very stylish, minimal, artistic, care about the environment + this shows in how they dress. 

HSF - What is the one bag you’d never resell for love nor money..

DD - I would never sell a bag my husband + best friend (an amazing bag designer) designed + made for my birthday. I wish I could have kept any of the Chanel bags that we have sold recently!

HSF - And lastly Danni, what’s next for you at The Hosta? 

DD - I want to grow my Instagram following + as lockdowns lift I would love to shoot more + collaborate with others. Although I am an expert in bags I am a novice when it comes to social media + as ever the perfectionist I can always see areas to improve. 

Follow Danni @THE_HOSTA // T H E - H O S T A . C O M

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Great New Reads, April 2021

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What's Hot on Your Bookshelf, April 2021

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‘KLARA AND THE SUN’ BY KAZUO ISHIGURO

From her place in the store, Klara, an Artificial Friend with outstanding observational qualities, watches carefully the behaviour of those who come in to browse, and of those who pass in the street outside. She remains hopeful a customer will soon choose her, but when the possibility emerges that her circumstances may change for ever, Klara is warned not to invest too much in the promises of humans.

Shop this title HERE

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‘ON EARTH WE’RE BRIEFLY GORGEOUS’ BY OCEAN VUONG

This is a letter from a son to a mother who cannot read. Written when the speaker, Little Dog, is in his late twenties, the letter unearths a family's history that began before he was born. It tells of Vietnam, of the lasting impact of war, and of his family's struggle to forge a new future. And it serves as a doorway into parts of Little Dog's life his mother has never known - episodes of bewilderment, fear and passion - all the while moving closer to an unforgettable revelation.

Shop this title HERE

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‘NOMADLAND’ BY JESSICA BRUDER

From the beetroot fields of North Dakota to the campgrounds of California to Amazon’s CamperForce program in Texas, employers have discovered a new, low-cost labour pool, made up largely of transient older adults. These invisible casualties of the Great Recession have taken to the road by the tens of thousands in RVs and modified vans, forming a growing community of nomads.

Nomadland tells a revelatory tale of the dark underbelly of the American economy – one which foreshadows the precarious future that may await many more of us. At the same time, it celebrates the exceptional resilience and creativity of people who have given up ordinary rootedness to survive, but have not given up hope.

Shop this title on Amazon

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‘HOW TO DO THE WORK’ BY DR. NICOLE LePERA

As a clinical psychologist, Dr Nicole LePera found herself frustrated by the limitations of traditional psychotherapy. Wanting more for her patients - and for herself - she began a journey to develop a united philosophy of mental, physical and spiritual health that equips people with the tools necessary to heal themselves. After experiencing the life-changing results herself, she began to share what she'd learned with others - and The Holistic Psychologist was born.

Now Dr LePera is ready to share her much-requested protocol with the world. In How to Do the Work, she offers both a manifesto for self-healing and an essential guide to creating a more vibrant, authentic, and joyful life. Drawing on the latest research from both scientific research and healing modalities, Dr LePera helps us recognise how adverse experiences and trauma in childhood live with us, keeping us stuck engaging in patterns of codependency, emotional immaturity, and trauma bonds. Unless addressed, these self-sabotaging behaviours can quickly become cyclical, leaving people feeling unhappy, unfulfilled, and unwell.

In How to Do the Work, Dr LePera offers readers the support and tools that will allow them to break free from destructive behaviours to reclaim and recreate their lives. Nothing short of a paradigm shift, this is a celebration of empowerment that will forever change the way we approach mental wellness and self-care.

Shop this title on Amazon

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‘GILEAD’ BY MARILYNNE ROBINSON

In 1956, toward the end of Reverend John Ames’s life, he begins a letter to his young son, a kind of last testament to his remarkable forebears. ‘It is a book of such meditative calm, such spiritual intensity that is seems miraculous that her silence was only for 23 years; such measure of wisdom is the fruit of a lifetime. Robinson’s prose, aligned with the sublime simplicity of the language of the bible, is nothing short of a benediction. Winner of 2005 Pulitzer Prize for Fiction.

Shop this title HERE

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‘LAS T CALL’ BY ELON GREEN

The Townhouse Bar, midtown, July 1992: The piano player seems to know every song ever written, the crowd belts out the lyrics to their favorites, and a man standing nearby is drinking a Scotch and water. The man strikes the piano player as forgettable. 

He looks bland and inconspicuous. Not at all what you think a serial killer looks like. But that's what he is, and tonight, he has his sights set on a gray haired man. He will not be his first victim. 

Nor will he be his last. 

The Last Call Killer preyed upon gay men in New York in the '80s and '90s and had all the hallmarks of the most notorious serial killers. Yet because of the sexuality of his victims, the skyhigh murder rates, and the AIDS epidemic, his murders have been almost entirely forgotten. 

This gripping true-crime narrative tells the story of the Last Call Killer and the decades-long chase to find him. And at the same time, it paints a portrait of his victims and a vibrant community navigating threat and resilience.

Shop this title on Amazon

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‘ACTS OF DESPERATION’ BY MEGAN NOLAN

Love was the final consolation, would set ablaze the fields of my life in one go, leaving nothing behind. I thought of it as a force which would clean me and by its presence make me worthy of it. There was no religion in my life after early childhood, and a great faith in love was what I had cultivated instead. Oh, don't laugh at me for this, for being a woman who says this to you. I hear myself speak.

Even now, even after all that took place between us, I can still feel how moved I am by him. Ciaran was that downy, darkening blond of a baby just leaving its infancy. He was the most beautiful man I had ever seen. None of it mattered in the end; what he looked like, who he was, the things he would do to me. To make a beautiful man love and live with me had seemed - obviously, intuitively - the entire point of life. My need was greater than reality, stronger than the truth, more savage than either of us would eventually bear. How could it be true that a woman like me could need a man's love to feel like a person, to feel that I was worthy of life? And what would happen when I finally wore him down and took it?

Shop this title on Amazon

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The HSF Documentary List Part III

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This list is updated regularly

The Moments That Made Me; My Interview with Roxie Nafousi

Today something I’ve carried with me my whole life is no longer something I hold in silence or exclusive to the core group of people I love most in this world. I never thought I’d share this part of my life but screw it, it’s time to open up a conversation around childhood sexual abuse + stand up for our children. It’s no longer something to brush under the carpet or shy away from as both an important conversation to be mature enough to have + something that is absolutely a responsibility that lies in our hands, as adults, as something that needs way more attention at every level, here in Ireland + globally. The UN classifies anything around the safety of children under the umbrella of child protection. It’s THAT important.

I believed that sharing my eating disorder article - which you can read here - was the furthest I’d ever go in terms of opening up about my personal life but in sharing it I realised how many others there are who are troubled by different types of mental health issues + when the opportunity arose to speak with my dear friend, mentor Roxie Nafousi, I felt ready to share the entire story. No more shame-inflicting secrets or holding this as a cloud above my head + a darkness in my life. This isn’t ever going to define who I am or what my life is about. It is a part of my life story but it isn’t the entire thing. I’ve got so much ahead + I’m excited to finally be stepping into all of who I truly am, no longer confined to the parts my trauma once held me captive to.

This story isn’t mine alone. It’s the story of so many others who have been been affected by sexual abuse. I am not special + I am certainly not a victim. I have survived. Yes I carry scars + it’s taken SO much f*cking work, ugly unfolding + then a lot of painful healing to get to this moment, this first conversation, so publicly.

Thank you to my dear friend + mentor + someone I’ve been working with on a 1-1 basis on my own personal path this past year, Roxie Nafousi, for creating a beautiful, safe + caring space for me to chat this through with you + hopefully allow anyone out there who walks or has walked the same path I have had to. I can never thank you enough.

I want to say too that there are many beautiful people who have held my hand through my life. My beautiful parents + brother who saw so much of the pain + never left my side. Ever. I love you guys to death. My fiancé Paul who allowed me the space to fall apart + come back together as the strongest version of myself - always loving me no matter what. I love you PH. My best friends who stood so closely by my side + never gave in to my severely negative view of myself, always seeing + loving the parts of me that I couldn’t believe in. And to the therapists who DID help - the wonderful ones who made such a difference in my world. Wow there’s been a lot of bullshit/drama in the time I’ve spent being helped + so, acknowledging those who really did make a loving difference is so important to me. Thank you!

Below you can hear my interview with Roxie. And if you find yourself in a similar situation, no matter your age, please you are not alone. I am here + there is ALWAYS hope, always a light at the end of the tunnel.

5 Virtual Self-Development Events to Check Out This Spring

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T H E H A P P I N E S S W E B I N A R

Roxie Nafousi has been such an incredible incredible part of my own wellness journey + her workshops are just EPIC. If you haven’t caught one of her 7 Steps to Manifesting virtual events you are in for a treat. I do them every time she has one + learn something new every time. Coming soon is her Happiness workshop with Mo Gawdat & Dr. Tara Swart, two experts in the field of self-development + finding the true joy in your life. I certainly can’t wait for this one..

March 20th 2021 // 1.30pm GMT

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M I N D , B O D Y + S O U L

Having connected with Zoe, of Maia Well Co. a while back, I couldn’t help but truly come to adore her fabulous energy as a pilates teacher + quite simply too, as a human - the sweetest soul doesn’t come close to describing her. Zoe’s upcoming full-day virtual retreat is sure to be ultra fabulous; with a schedule packed full of workshops, classes + tutorials to nourish your body, mind + spirit, she + her expert team incorporate all the self-care you could imagine into one day.

March 7th // 9am - 7.15pm

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F A C I A L I S T T O F A C I A L I S T

Again another tried + tested (I only ever talk about people, places + things I genuinely use + love) part of my life is my skincare routine with Dawn Hill of Florasion here in Dublin. Dawn is an expert facialist + stockist of my now favourite skincare brand - the one I will never turn my back on, Biologique Recherche who hosts her IG Live series, ‘Facialist to Facialist’. Announced on her IG a week in advance of the Live, Dawn speaks to other experts in the skincare industry + is so pro in every respect. To find out more about Dawn + her philosophy on reaching a healthy balance in our skin, check out my interview with her here.

Catchup with Dawn on her fabulous IG account for her next LIVE @florasion_ie

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T H E H S F I G V I R T U A L M A S T E R C L A S S

A little plug here for my own workshop, but if you’re an independent brand or business looking to start or perhaps deepen your understanding of the game of Instagram for businesses, how to create beautiful content while also streamlining the time + effort you’re currently (most likely overspending) on around the digital market platform, this is for you.

March 22nd // 7.30pm GMT

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B U I L D I N G R E S I L I E N C E

I came across yoga teacher + general positivity Queen Sophie Dear on Instagram (where else would I find anyone fab fab haha) this past year + have attended two of her workshops since. Her depth of honestly about her own journey in recent times + her inspiring life in Bali are so engaging + I adore following her ever since. Sophie’s upcoming working, ‘Building Resilience’ is sure to be as super chic as it is super meaningful .

March 7th // 9am - 11am GMT

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Online Trainers + Workouts I'm Loving During Lockdown

I LOVE to move my body.I cherish the moments in the day I dedicate to that as a practice that, these days, has become so sacred + important to me. I LOVE + am so grateful that I have the ability to do so + love the energy it gives me, both mentally + physically. Daily movement is such a hugely important part of my overall wellbeing + something I simply can’t be inconsistent with. I did a post about online workouts + classes I love last year + just like you, I’ve obviously had a whole lot of working out at home time to try out some more new trainers + classes over the past year, while also delving deeper into the ones I have always adored like Melissa Wood Health - which of course featured on my previous list too. As we find ourselves still working our way through to the other side of this lockdown life + to a time where in-person gym sessions + a fun Saturday morning at an actual class are a real thing again, here are some of the amazing online trainers + workouts I mix + match into my weekly routine lately..

Audrey O’Connor is not only one of the sweetest people but on top of it, she’s absolutely one of my favourite pilates teachers. Taking mat work to the max, her classes are on fire! I love to feel the burn in a pilates class + you can be sure to with Audrey. She’s also just such a fun teacher, bringing the best kind of humour + vibe. Having recently launched CORE STATE, a membership platform where you an access all she’s about + get your butt on the mat! I genuinely couldn’t recommend Audrey + CORE STATE more! Also her work around mobility is second to none, I adore!

C O R E S T A T E H Q . C O M

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L O U I S A D R A K E M E T H O D

Louisa Drake is London’s hottest exercise goddess. Focusing on a very a unique fusion style of working out that combines her expertise as a professional dancer + choreographer with her incredible knowledge of the body + how to make movement fun + effective, Louisa’s personalised method brings you on a shape-changing journey, resulting in longer, leaner lines + a strengthened body tone. Having travelled the world working with celebrities like Gwyneth Paltrow + Victoria Beckham, in 2017 Louisa set out to create her own method, opening her very own studio in London + it’s HOT AF (back pre a COVID world, I loved visiting any time I was in London). Incorporating resistance, conditioning, cardio + stretching, LDM is available online with videos to buy that you can enjoy on repeat or live classes to attend via Zoom while we stay home. LDM is a complete game changer, just give it a try!

l o u i s a d r a k e . c o m

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M E L I S S A W O O D H E A L T H

Melissa Wood-Tepperberg is a Mom, wellness coach, avid meditator, certified yoga + pilates teacher + plant-based eater, working to shift the way we live + help her fans thrive from the inside out. As someone who is health conscious + has a past with eating disorders, I love her philosophy around wellness. She moves because she loves her body, never as a form of self-punishment. Something I now thankfully believe in too. Her goal is to help you find your best self through movement methods, intuitive eating + mindful meditation. Her method is a monthly subscription with membership including 12 workouts available at all times, exclusive workouts published every Monday by Melissa herself + bonus flows + guided meditations throughout the month. Her upbeat personality + infectiously positive attitude is completely contagious + she is the perfect workout companion at home.

Get a 5 day free trial before committing - but trust me, you won’t be able to give it up. 

m e l i s s a w o o d h e a l t h . c o m

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A N D Y H I C K E Y F I T N E S S

I’ve trained just a few times, pre COVID, with Andy in person, here in Dublin, + really love his energy + approach to working out. It’s intense + it works! Fun + to the point, he is really good at what he does + his success is so well deserved in the fitness sphere. I incorporate his 8 week core program into my week + love how simple but effective he makes the program. I’ve genuinely noticed a sharper strength in my core since bringing it into my weekly movement schedule + love the fact that it’s completely achievable in just 3 days at about 15 minutes per workout. I highly recommend his program if you’re looking to boost your core work. He also provides 1-1 training online + other classes.

@ A N D Y H I C K E Y F I T N E S S

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M / B O D Y

M/BODY by Marnie Alton is such a FUN + fabulous class to get you moving. A mix of pilates, dance + HIIT, Marnie offers everything from a quick 10-minute blast to an hour long whole body sweat session. In each class Marnie provides amendments + executes so perfectly on explaining exactly what she means as she helps you navigate your way through each movement. I love how tiny some of the movements are - although it’s HIIT, it’s low-impact - yet how insanely burn-y they are. Think HIIT meets barre!

M B O D Y O N L I N E . C O M

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The Workout Mafia is one I’d be wanting to try since seeing it on Monikh Dale’s IG account + then when my best friend said it’s the sh*t, I had to try it. It’s so badass. Currently only £25 per month for a full subscription, The Workout Mafia is home to five of London’s top five personal trainers who each have their own personal style but all come together in one mission.. to make you feel as sweaty + strong as possible. The way it works is you can join the daily live class or catch it on demand later in the day. I’ve really enjoyed every class since signing up + so far, it’s been pretty tough, which I love.

T H E W O R K O U T M A F I A . C O M

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My Experience of Living With An Eating Disorder; What Nobody Talks About

In hind sight I can’t believe I once thought things were ok as they were then, or perhaps more aptly, how desperately I worked + tried to convince myself they were. Those around me who loved me so deeply, knew things were going from bad to worse + quite frankly, were the furthest thing from ok. In desperate attempts to get me to see what was happening + to understand the dark veil my life was drowning in, they loved me harder + harder than I ever realised back then. Firstly, I want to start this by saying how damn amazing it is I have the ability to write this. I once couldn’t concentrate on anything! Thanks to those who love me I’m alive. I am SO alive now. It’s years later + I’ve worked my ass off (or back on in this case) to get my life on track. A life I really very nearly lost, several times. 

Anorexia. Bulimia. Binge eating. Orthorexia. Whatever you do, there’s no escaping the fact that they’re basically all the same - a symptom of a much deeper issue + not the specific point of suffering that needs addressing. Whatever you do though, it’s an important thing to note, it’s NOT who you are. For years + years it completely defined me + my existence. Every thought, every action + every single second was consumed + determined by my eating disorder. 

What I did was anorexia which later turned into bulimia. Two things I didn’t choose - nobody in their right mind would EVER choose such dark realities. The eating disorders that blurred so many years of my life were my way of, unknowingly, trying to control something - anything - in a world I understood to be dangerous + scary. Maybe one day I’ll elaborate on that but for now, I write this in the hope my experience + subsequent recovery - and this is my experience alone - might help someone directly or someone you may know who is currently in the depths of despair due to the terrors of when control around food goes too far. This is my love letter to the lost girl I was + to those in the same place. It’s all the things I wished I’d known, understood + actually took on board all those years ago when I wasn’t even aware of what was happening nor what lay ahead on the path of a life ruined by eating disorders. All the things nobody talks about publicly. All the shittiest things that WILL eventually happen, the things that no matter how ‘strong’ you think you are or how ‘in control’ you’re determined to be, will eventually come to be your existence. 

Nobody talks about the deep + dirty reality of it, well not out loud anyway. When I say nobody, I mean those going through an eating disorder. Those inside the vortex of nothingness + the search for full control. It’s a deep secret that needs to be protected at all costs. Because if admitted to, then you will have to do something about it. And that thought terrified you the most. Nobody talks about the real reason you’re no longer joining the girls for brunch on a weekend or why, staying at your new boyfriends house is stressing you the fuck out because, damn it you can’t keep up the lie about having already had breakfast at home when you clearly woke up in the same house. Nobody talks about the amount of laxatives you have to take before going out to dinner with others cause you fear SO much the idea of having to maybe eat even a few bites in front of your friends or family. The insane level of these same laxatives you’re taking is also something nobody talks about - nor even knows about cause, like everything else around you eating disorder, it’s your deep, dark secret. Nobody talks about the reason you now have to travel far + wide to even get your hands on more laxatives cause, even though you’ve promised they’re not for you, all the local pharmacies know what’s going on. Nobody talks about it but everyone knows it. 

Nobody talks about the amount of cardio you have to do in order to keep yourself in somewhat of a ‘good’ mood for the day.. hell nobody talks about how moody AF you’ve become, moody like a teenage girl whose hormones are quite literally all.over.place. On that note too, nobody talks about the truth of having lost your periods long long ago + how deeply you now have to convince yourself you never even dreamed of being a Mum one day anyway. Who cares. Well that’s what you’re trying to tell yourself anyway. Nobody talks about how your every waking thought is about your body. You know you’ve lost weight but no matter what the scales says, it’s never low enough. So you HAVE to keep going. Loose more. Move more. Eat less. Another day. No body talks about waking up to check the same bones that you could feel protruding from your body are still there today. You check. And check again. 

Nobody talks about the way in which your food needs to be thought out. How prepping it + what you’re allowed becomes stricter + stricter. Entire food groups vanish from your eating abilities. So strict there’s becoming very little on the list of foods, permitted anymore. Nobody talks about the paranoia you have around people putting things in your water or on your food that might make you gain weight without your consent. It’s fucking mad, the whole thing but nobody talks about the moments where you want to scream for help yet can’t - cause again you fear SO much the idea of gaining weight that you’re willing to take more of the heat palpitations + blackouts from being so under weight than admit to any of this being real. 

Nobody talks about the chewing gum + the mental amounts of sparkling water you’re drinking to keep the hunger at bay. So much sparkling water you’re at risk of a stroke. Hunger though? What’s that you want to say. But yes you are STARVING. S.T.A.R.V.I.N.G. You are beyond mentally + physically malnourished + no matter how much you know it or try to convince yourself you’re not, you cannot admit to being hungry. Cannot + will not. The word isn’t allowed. It’s a sin in your mind. And although you’re not religious in that sense, it’s a moral sin + it is the ultimate failure. Again another thing nobody talks about are these obsessional thoughts that will not stop.

Nobody talks about the madness that goes on in your head. Things like say, being terrified you’ll gain weight if someone lights a candle in your presence that has some sort of food in the title. Like a nice Pomegranate Noir candle (back when I thought that was shit).. yep, for real, nobody talks about how paranoid you become that being in this very room with the candle that says pomegranate in the title means you are inhaling calories because it’s a food? WHAT? It’s INSANE for me to look back on those kinds of things that, as nobody talks about, absolutely ruin every moment that others take as so normal + everyday. Everything, even as little as lighting a candle becomes a mental ordeal. 

Something else nobody talks about really is, despite your most desperate pleas to those who love you to believe you you’re fine, what actually starts to happen in your body - things so obvious you can’t but notice. From blacking out + loosing your sight so many times a day due to your body having to work so hard just to function now that it can’t keep your blood pressure at a normal level - you no longer see it as weird or strange it now happens so often. Nobody talks about the layer of fluff your body has had to grow (yep girls, for real!) to keep itself warm. Your arms, chest, back. Fluffy. Yes you loose that as your body gets well again but nobody talks about getting hairier in the search for “skinny enough”. Nor does anybody talk about how thin + weird your own hair has become. It’s falling out in clumps + you have to make sure no one you love sees this as it’s just another reason for them to be right in how out of control things are getting. Nobody tells you either of the worry + sleepless nights your loved ones endure. Their time spent troubled by witnessing their daughter, sister, girlfriend, friend wasting away before their eyes. Nobody talks of the reality loved ones go through in the silenced screams + pleas to get through to you, only to be pushed away.

Nobody talks about how stressful it becomes to go to bed at night. You gain weight if you’re not moving + sleeping means not moving - as does being in bed. Or so you’re completely convinced. So no more sleep allowed. No way. Nobody talks about the nervous tension you have around being away from a bathroom for too long either. Your bladder is getting weak (again something you definitely have to keep secret as then the doctors / your family will have more evidence you need major help + your body is dangerously breaking down) + you can no longer hold your wee. No joke. You’re a 20-something year old who wets herself. Still though you aren’t convinced it’s that bad. Even the endless heart palpitations- nope, definitely not taking those as a sign your threading on thin ice.

Then comes the binge/purge cycle. And wow what fun that is. NOT. Nobody tells you that as you start to eat again + think that getting rid of the food is the only way to cope with that whole situation + that shit is about to get even worse! Nobody talks about the seriously low potassium levels from purging that you lay on the floor of the bathroom - coming to without a clue at first how long you’ve been out for. You feel dizzy, your arms are numb + you can’t move your legs. Shit, what’s happening to your body? Nobody talks about the lengths you will go to to find a bathroom in ANY situation, driving from your boyfriends after that tiny yoghurt at breakfast you had to eat informer of him to ward off the questions that are beginning to pop up.. off you go to a nearby garage (I mean how elegant right?) - like WTF!!! Getting sick in dingy bathrooms that you typically wouldn’t even allow yourself pee in in a normal situation -all this desperation now that you’ve become a complete slave to the bitch of bulimia. Nobody talks about the level of crazy amounts of food the binges have gotten to - it feels so urgent you would eat a gone-off sandwich from the bin your body craves food so much. Nobody talks about the secret eating that’s started to happen. Anything to fill yourself up (without allowing anyone see) + then throw it all back up. Nobody talks about the confusion you feel. Wanting to stop yet sticking your fingers down your throat again. Just one more time. You promise. And promise again. Thankfully it’s been about 3 years since I last got sick in a self-inflicted way + I just can’t imagine ever going back to that hell. You know it’s all a waste of a your time but yet you just can’t understand how you will ever eat again without getting rid of it - whatever the amount, large or small. Nobody talks about the days you wake to feel only you wish you were dead. It’s a mess. You really hate this eating disorder shit but you can’t let anyone in. It’s lonely as hell. Nobody talks about that either. How lonely + separated from the world you’ve become. Nobody talks about how swollen your face is from the vomiting or how your throat is SO sore the whole time, red raw from the acid that comes up with every retch. Nobody talks about any of it.

Shining a light on all the horrible things that I’ve found to be real is important to me now as I live free of 99%  of it - the stuff nobody talks about in terms of the real shit that happens behind closed doors in the life of someone in the grips of an eating disorder. It’s NOT glamorous. It’s not Victoria Beckham chic. It’s HELL. Skinny isn’t a thing to be proud of or to identify yourself as. Skinny, when you are a slave to your own mind’s ability to trick you into thinking you need to be skinnier, is nothing but the time, a solid indication, to ask for help - or let in the help that’s been trying to get through to you for so long.

If you know someone who is, or you are that someone tormented by an eating disorder - even if you’re having doubts or your mind is trying to convince you you’re fine.. I want to tell you something; you can + will enjoy life again. ’Thin enough’ is BULLSHIT. It’s a mental trap you might think you’re in full control of but that is taking away your life. Every day spent protecting your eating disorder instead of believing in a better way to live, is another day wasted that, and in my own experience that could be yours to live + love. I’ve spent extended periods in hospitals, treatment centres + in therapists rooms tormented by anorexia + bulimia.. then, in my stubbornness to go back to hospital, Mum made me sleep in her bed for a year as she was so terrified I’d have a heart attack + she didn’t want me to die alone. Her love is something I will perhaps only understand upon, one day, hopefully becoming a Mum myself but forever in my mind she will be a superhero who saved me from myself I’m so many occasions. None of that is living. Neither are any of the things I mentioned above, all of which became my reality for years + none of which are thankfully any longer things I face on a daily basis . You can be free of them too if you find yourself in any of them. I have my period back + today I’m proud of that. Again, I once bizarrely believed that not having my period for 7 years was a positive thing. I believed that the day I got it back I would have to end my life as I wouldn’t be able to cope with being “fat”. Gosh I can’t believe how badly that was the grip ED once had on me I no longer hold my breath walking past the bakery in fear that the smell of bread might make me gain weight. LOL, oh my god, I actually believed that once too.

It takes time, a lot longer than you would wish I admit.. but a loss lot less if you just commit. Honestly too it takes a LOT of effort + hard work to get to a better place with your body + food + allowing yourself grow into a much better way of being but damn, being in this place, writing this piece today, I’m SO incredibly grateful I stuck it out + continue to put in the work. It’s never perfect but I would not go back there for anything!

I mentioned above that eating disorders aren’t the core of someone’s issues but the longer they are allowed continue + run wild, the more of a deadly grip you fall into. The eating disorder becomes the one in control. It once felt like your best friend. You thought you’d be BFF’s for life. But shit hits the fan + there’s no going back to it ever being a crutch to lean on. It could take you years to get to a better place, as it did me.. but time will pass anyway + would you rather be deeper in the dark or stepping, one tiny step at a time into the light? 

I didn’t ever want to share things like this in the fear I would become defined as the person who had an eaten disorder but in my every day now, as I live my life + am happy doing + being me these days, I do not define myself as the girl with the ED.. + for me, that’s really all that matters now. I am not a doctor or any sort of professional + this one piece can never cover everything nor come close to really explaining how incredibly dark it is living with a life-threatening + debilitating eating disorder. it’s simply my first attempt ever to piece together parts of it that might make sense to you, or as I said, someone you may care for. It’s my way to try to enlighten or help in exposing my experience so I might reach another who needs it + I do not claim for one second to know what another’s experience may be. None of this is meant to be advice, it’s simply my experience + I share it in the dream that it might help someone - even just one person - to know that you do not walk this alone + that if I’ve been there, which I have been + I’m now HAPPY, living a fulfilled life, loving + living in all it’s imperfections, then you can too. 

Love R x

Dawn Hill of Florasion; The Interview

HSF - Dawn, as you’ve taught me, skin + skincare are such individualised experiences for each person. My own understanding + patience with myself has depended since working with you; thank you for that. Explain though in your own words what your philosophy with skin is…

DH - My Philosophy with skin has always been about education. Educating my clients on their skin, on products + what truly works is key for me. A fast sell has never been the aim, because I’ve been there.  I’ve left salons with a bag full of expensive products without a clue why I actually handed over all that cash. Starting small is important. When you’re educated about your skin, why it behaves how it does + how to care for it properly, you become the master of it + learn to love it more. 

HSF - As you say here, your work is about the long haul, about investing in our skin + not falling for the often BS promises the beauty industry “guarantees” us. How do you manage people’s desire for instant results + the reality that good things take time - especially now in a world full of immediate gratification..

DH - To be honest I’m straight up from the get-go. New clients can often be taken aback by my honesty + openness about the industry. I’ve worked in beauty from so many angles - from blogging back in the day, to becoming a beauty journalist, to working in beauty PR + being a brand manager for some of the most well-know brands in Ireland. I know what goes into selling a product, how to market it to the masses + most of it is BS. The beauty industry can promise the world, but rarely does it deliver. It’s all about sales at the end of the day. I tell clients all the time to manage expectation of what skincare can actually do. Although the skincare industry is booming + is always evolving, there is a limit to what it can do. I’m real about that. There are so many factors that contribute to healthy skin, skincare is a small part of it. 

HSF - I certainly don’t need persuading (fully addicted since starting on a consistent routine with the brand last year) but explain, if you will, the reasons for your love of Biologique Recherche as a strong foundational range of products for anyone’s routine + why you chose to work with them over any other brand at that high-end level..

DH - I couldn’t have started my facial studio with anything else. Genuinely. BR works, there are no two ways about it. They don’t follow trends, they set them.  They don’t include ingredients ‘on trend’, they work with ingredients that work in-sync with your skin. They also don’t put money into clever marketing + PR strategies, instead they invest in research + development. I’ve seen BR change my clients skin into healthy, stronger skin. The main thing about BR is how bespoke it is. Every serum concoction, mask mixture is done so with YOUR skin in mind. So the finish is bespoke to you, always. 

HSF - What are your favourite products from BR?

DH - Where to begin!! I can’t be without Serum 3R, Masque Biofixine, Masque Vernix, P50V, the finishing serums, creme acides de fruites, Lait VIP02, mask vivant. There are a lot!!

HSF - Good things come to those who wait (+ work consistently toward what they want) I’ve found. How long does it take most people to find balance with their skin so that you can actually step up the routine to begin to see results?

DH - I always tell clients to give it about 4-6 months. That may sound like a ling time, but absolutely nothing works overnight. Usually to be honest, it’s a year after clients first start on their skincare journey with me that we see the most spectacular results. And by then, they’re so educated about their skin + know it so well, they barely need me anymore!! 

HSF - Your clinic, Florasion, is the physical manifestation of your expertise + passion for helping people achieve their best. How is it running your own business? And how have you had to pivot during these times? (You’re a true inspiration)

DH - Running a business, especially during a pandemic has been + is a rollercoaster. It can be exhausting trying to keep it going + continuously think outside the box + adapt. But I have + always have had a vision for Floraison + slowly but surely it’s coming into fruition. I just want to create something a little different. It can be hard staying in your own lane too, your own bubble when there’s so much going on in the industry. You can start to question yourself + your abilities but I think if your vision is strong enough, it can keep you going. 

HSF - Where does the name Florasion come from? 

DH - Floraison is actually French for bloom. I absolutely love florals + the whole process of blooming + have done since I was a little girl. It was the perfect name for the business I wanted to create. A space for women to bloom, skin coming into bloom, helping skin bloom + to be its best. 

HSF - How often do you think people should be getting luxury-grade facials?

DH - It genuinely depends on the condition of the skin, what we need to treat + most importantly, budget! Some clients come in on the button every six to seven weeks, the likes of brides-to-be will come in every eight weeks + others every three months. But it’s a very individual choice.

HSF - With lock-down life in full swing again, you’re obviously not working with clients in person at the moment, how can people  get started on a personalised routine under your guidance?

DH - A virtual consultation is best! It’s pretty much like it would be in the studio, although obviously I dont get to work on the skin. But it’s quite in-depth + based around educating the client on their skin, talking through their current routine + changing it up as we see fit. 

HSF - Outside the obvious nature of products + a health focused lifestyle, what tips or techniques do you swear by in the search for better skin?

DH - It may sound boring + it’s not an over-night thing, but lifestyle. Lifestyle is huge. By lifestyle I mean stress levels, healthy sleep habits, exercise + diet (to a certain extent. I’m not into cutting things from your diet). When I’m less stressed, I sleep better, my mood is lighter, I feed myself better + my skin shows it. But of course, it takes time. I like to think of it like this; if you eat broccoli for dinner once, it doesn’t mean all those vitamins + minerals are going to benefit you straight away with a couple of fork fulls. Its a process, it takes time + commitment to see the positive changes. I swear by green smoothies too, they make a huge difference to the skin when kept up. 

HSF - Are there any skincare devices you would recommend for at-home use?

DH - Yes there a re a few!! I’m going to keep them under my hat for now, but LED + some facial muscle trainers can be amazing. Again they all take time + consistent commitment, but more on that coming soon!

HSF - What products do you think are really important to invest in + which ones are totally ok to spend less on?

DH - Treatment products - so the likes of P50 + serums. These are long contact products with small molecular weight meaning they’re able to penetrate that little bit deeper into the skin and work harder. They’re usually the most active ingredients wise. Moisturisers do just that - they moisturise + keep the skin supple. Obviously there a some that are a little more targeted + therefore will be more expensive. 

HSF - How important in someone’s daily routine is SPF? Does SPF in foundation suffice? And is there one you can’t live without?

DH - Extremely important but its important to use common sense here. There is definitely a lot of misinformation about SPFs. If you’re indoors all day + only leave the house when its dark for a walk - no SPF needed. Also - use an SPF from a brand whose game is SPF, brands that put a lot of research into their formulations. SPF in foundation most certainly will not suffice. Think of it - usually they only have an SPF of 15 in them which isn’t enough, but also think about the amount of foundation you apply - its just a few drops realistically. For SPF to truly protect, you need to apply half a teaspoon amount - who would apply that much foundation? Some SPFs are superior in their finish + protection of the skin. Heliocare is my go-to + I absolutely love their Water Gel version. I usually go for un-tinted because as previously mentioned, you need to use a lot to get the desired protection. 

HSF - What are your thoughts on cult products + skincare trends? Any you can’t stand or ones you do tend to stand by?

DH - Cult products I can get on board with but not all of them are truly cult - a lot of the time it’s noise + clever marketing + you buy the product + are left disappointed. But they do exist. Skincare trends - no. Despise them + more so when they’re plastered all over Instagram + brands jump on board. Trend ingredients are here today, then gone tomorrow. Same for treatments. For example, micro-dermabrasisson - huge a few years ago, but now you never hear of it because it can be so disruptive to the skin barrier. Dermaplanning is the same. Also trend for clean beauty (so much scaremongering + the term ‘clean’ + ‘non-toxic’ is damaging in my opinion) + the go-hard -or -go -home approach to skin is big but is just not healthy for any skin.  

HSF - In your opinion, what is the most under-appreciated piece of advice ignored by us about skin?

DH - Skin has pores, skin can be uneven, patchy + a bit all over the shop at times + that is NORMAL. Skin can change daily, even from morning to night - thats the nature of skin. Perfection doesn’t exist and when you stop searching for it, you grow to love your skin more. 

HSF - And lastly, Dawn what is next for you at Florasion?

DH - I have so many plans. But it all comes back to the same thing - to truly help people become more educated about skin + to actually love their skin. To help women become more confident in their skin really + to build a blooming empire that people love to visit, be it online or in studio.

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Book your consultation with Dawn at F L O R A S I O N . I E // Follow on IG @florasion_ie

Designer Spotlight; Piece of White

Founded in 2017 by Turkish designer Zeynep Tansug, Piece of White is a stunning representation of something classic, appreciated, respected + imagined anew. Zeynep started the brand as a core collection of white shirts, constructed + created in a more dramatic manner; ultimately bringing to life the essence of daily dressing up. 

Having grown over the past four years as a go-to label for some of the world’s most perfectly dressed women (Rosie Huntington-Whiteley’s wardrobe has a number of pieces), the label has expanded to include a beautiful selection of jumpsuits, dresses, tops + trousers. Off the shoulder, one shoulder + sometimes no shoulder, whatever the design it becomes desired. Think unique twists + insane detailing, met with negative space backs + elegant high necklines. While using mostly 100% silk or cotton poplin, each piece is beautifully handmade with top craftsmanship + attention to detail. 

Piece of White is redefining  the definition of desirable pieces + taking those everyday wardrobe staples to an entirely new level. 

Now stocked as an edit on online at Moda Operandi or you can find the full collection on the label’s on website. 

Shop at piecesofwhite.co.uk

ALL IMAGES VIA PIECE OF WHITE

What Is.. Dermaplaning

Working as an effective exfoliation procedure, dermaplaning is one of the hot topics on the agenda of all beauty seekers and aestheticians alike right now.  Short and sweet, the procedure is very simple with endless results. It consists of a sterile surgical scalpel that a trained beauty therapist uses to gently shave off the surface of the skin in order to remove all excess dead skin and peach fuzz hair. 

Don’t let the fear of hearing ‘surgical scalpel’ in the same sentence as your face scare you though, as there is no pain to the procedure and very little - to almost no - downtime post treatment for most people. Typically it is used as an add to another facial or peel. One of the most celebrated benefits of dermaplaning is that your skin is left without all the old cells, as it works to remove all the dead skin at the surface level, which then allows the skin’s absorption levels to fully revive. Lovers of the skin technique say it’s amazing how much longer products tend to last when they are being consistent with the treatment, as the skin’s ability to drink in all the products’ goodness is heightened so much more, making the skin look and feel clearer and brighter from every angle- and your monthly beauty product bills less I might add. Another use for Dermaplaning is the removal of any peach fuzz one might have on the face.

I’d been getting it done every few months + loved it. When COVID hit though + with it access to a trained aesthetician to attend in person suddenly vanished, I looked into being able to do it at home myself. Hello DERMAFLASH; one of the best at-home beauty tools. Easy to use, with very little way to do it wrong (make sure to watch the videos on the Dermaflash website here) or harm your skin, it’s a really good investment if you’re wanting to be able to continue your dermaplaning journey at home.

Personally I just love being able to do things at home in the comfort of my own space + the ease of my own time + although of course some things simply aren’t accessible, either financially or logistically, this one completely has my backing.

For best results, it is suggested to repeat the procedure every three to four weeks with a fresh as this leaves enough time for the skins natural rejuvenation process to take place - a cycle is typically about 30 days.

SHOP THE DERMAFLASH

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Clean Beauty; Ground Wellbeing

G R O U N D  is a newly launched luxury wellness brand I was recently introduced to + am truly loving. Focusing on artisan aromatherapy for your entire family, each product is created to awaken your senses through the beauty of + healing properties found in essential oils. Hand-crafted in small, quality-controlled batches in Cork, Ireland by Peigín Crowley, a globally celebrated curator of luxury spas, GROUND is neutral by design with each product created to encourage a sense of relaxation + grounding.

Peigín, has established a highly respected career in the wellness space as the originator + designer of high-end luxury spas in Ireland’s most indulgent properties including Cliff House Hotel, Old Head of Kinsale + Adore Manor. Her love of constructing beautiful experiences has been brought to life in her latest venture + is something you can see, smell + touch in each drop; a treasured treat in the every day rituals of self-care.

I was gifted some of the beautiful products from the range by Peigín when she first launched - the Recovery Hair Oil + Sleep Face Oil + I have been using them ever since. The Recovery Hair Oil quickly became a favourite; each time I wash my hair I gently massage the product into my scalp before getting into the shower, then after towel drying it, post shower, I put about 5 drops into the ends of my hair - again gently massaging it in. I’m particular about what I use on my hair + skin as I get older + I just love how natural GROUND products are - no gross pesticides or herbicides + each ingredient is organic (where possible) + completely sourced naturally.

One of the other products I love is the Sleep Face Oil. On the nights when I Gua Sha this is amazing, as with it’s beautiful texture, it means my Gua Sha stone glides so smoothly over my skin instead of pulling on it. Also with chamomile as one of it’s main ingredients, it means it’s a great way to de-stress your mind + body before bed. Peigín advises to rub the oils between your palms + inhale deeply before applying to the skin for an added boost to the senses - something that is applicable for the entire collection.

Since falling in love with G R O U N D products, I’ve ordered several others myself including the Uplifting Body Oil which is so divine after a lovely hot shower or bath. Our bodies skin needs that extra TLC in Winter + I‘ve found this (along with my unfailing love of Jojoba Oil) to be such a treat for dry skin + it smells so divine too.

You can find the full range, including Bath Salt, Body Oils, Face Balms, Face Oils, Face & Body Masks, Beard Oils + Mother + Baby products on BrownThomas.ie or directly on GROUNDWELLBEING.com

Great New Reads, January 2021

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What's Hot on Your Bookshelf, January 2021

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‘GIRL A’ BY ABIGAIL DEAN

Lex Gracie doesn’t want to think about her family. She doesn’t want to think about growing up in her parents’ House of Horrors. And she doesn’t want to think about her identity as Girl A: the girl who escaped. When her mother dies in prison and leaves Lex and her siblings the family home, she can’t run from her past any longer. Together with her sister, Evie, Lex intends to turn the House of Horrors into a force for good. But first she must come to terms with her six siblings – and with the childhood they shared.

Beautifully written and incredibly powerful, Girl A is a story of redemption, of horror, and of love.

Shop this title on Amazon

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‘LET ME TELL YOU WHAT I MEAN’ BY Joan Didion

Mostly drawn from the earliest part of her astonishing five-decade career, Didion writes about a Gamblers Anonymous meeting, a visit to William Randolph Hearst's castle at San Simeon, a reunion of WWII veterans in Las Vegas, and about topics ranging from Nancy Reagan to Robert Mapplethorpe, Martha Stewart and Ernest Hemingway. 

With an Introduction by Hilton Als, this stunning collection reveals what would become her subjects: the press, politics, California robber barons, women, the act of writing, and her own self-doubt. Each piece is classic Didion: incisive, bemused, and stunningly prescient.

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‘LUSTER’ BY RAVEN LEILANI

Edie is just trying to survive. She’s messing up in her dead-end admin job in her all-white office, is sleeping with all the wrong men, and has failed at the only thing that meant anything to her, painting. No one seems to care that she doesn’t really know what she’s doing with her life beyond looking for her next hook-up. And then she meets Eric, a white, middle-aged archivist with a suburban family, including a wife who has sort-of-agreed to an open marriage and an adopted black daughter who doesn’t have a single person in her life who can show her how to do her hair. As if navigating the constantly shifting landscape of sexual and racial politics as a young black woman wasn’t already hard enough, with nowhere else left to go, Edie finds herself falling head-first into Eric’s home and family.

Razor sharp, provocatively page-turning and surprisingly tender, Luster by Raven Leilani is a painfully funny debut about what it means to be young now.

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‘TROUBLED’ BY KENNETH R. ROSEN

In the middle of the night, they are vanished.

Each year thousands of young adults deemed out of control—suffering from depression, addiction, anxiety, and rage—are carted off against their will to remote wilderness programs and treatment facilities across the country. Desperate parents of these “troubled teens” fear it’s their only option. The private, largely unregulated behavioral boot camps break their children down, a damnation the children suffer forever.

Acclaimed journalist Kenneth R. Rosen knows firsthand the brutal emotional, physical, and sexual abuse carried out at these programs. He lived it. In Troubled, Rosen unspools the stories of four graduates on their own scarred journeys through the programs into adulthood. Based on three years of reporting and more than one hundred interviews with other clients, their parents, psychologists, and health-care professionals, Troubled combines harrowing storytelling with investigative journalism to expose the disturbing truth about the massively profitable, sometimes fatal, grossly unchecked redirection industry.

Not without hope, Troubled ultimately delivers an emotional, crucial tapestry of coming of age, neglect, exploitation, trauma, and fraught redemption.

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‘RED COMET’ BY Heather Clark

Determined not to read Plath's work as if her every act, from childhood on, was a harbinger of her tragic fate, Clark presents new materials about Plath's scientist father, her juvenile writings, and her psychiatric treatment, and evokes a culture in transition in the mid-twentieth century, in the shadow of the atom bomb and the Holocaust, as she explores Sylvia's world: her early relationships and determination not to become a conventional woman and wife; her conflicted ties to her well-meaning, widowed mother; her troubles at the hands of an unenlightened mental-health industry; and her Cambridge years and thunderclap meeting with Ted Hughes, a true marriage of minds that would change the course of poetry in English.

Clark's clear-eyed sympathy for Hughes, his lover Assia Wevill, and other demonized players in the arena of Plath's suicide promotes a deeper understanding of her final days, with their outpouring of first-rate poems. Along with illuminating readings of the poems themselves, Clark's meticulous, compassionate research brings us closer than ever to the spirited woman and visionary artist who blazed a trail that still lights the way for women poets the world over.

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‘SHUGGIE BAIN’ BY DOUGLAS STUART

It is 1981. Glasgow is dying and good families must grift to survive. Agnes Bain has always expected more from life. She dreams of greater things: a house with its own front door and a life bought and paid for outright (like her perfect, but false, teeth). But Agnes is abandoned by her philandering husband, and soon she and her three children find themselves trapped in a decimated mining town. As she descends deeper into drink, the children try their best to save her, yet one by one they must abandon her to save themselves. It is her son Shuggie who holds out hope the longest.

Shuggie is different. Fastidious and fussy, he shares his mother’s sense of snobbish propriety. The miners' children pick on him and adults condemn him as no’ right. But Shuggie believes that if he tries his hardest, he can be normal like the other boys and help his mother escape this hopeless place.

Douglas Stuart's Shuggie Bain lays bare the ruthlessness of poverty, the limits of love, and the hollowness of pride. A counterpart to the privileged Thatcher-era London of Alan Hollinghurst’s The Line of Beauty, it also recalls the work of Édouard Louis, Frank McCourt, and Hanya Yanagihara, a blistering debut by a brilliant writer with a powerful and important story to tell.

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‘A CHILDREN’S BIBLE’ BY Lydia Millet

A brilliant, indelible novel of teenage alienation and adult complacency in a world whose climate and culture are unravelling. Pulitzer Prize finalist Lydia Millet's sublime new novel-her first since the National Book Award-longlisted Sweet Lamb of Heaven- follows a group of eerily mature children on a forced vacation with their parents at a lakeside mansion. Contemptuous of their elders, who pass their days in a hedonistic stupor, the children are driven out into a chaotic landscape after a great storm descends. The story's narrator, Eve, devotes herself to the safety of her beloved little brother as events around them begin to mimic scenes from his cherished picture Bible. Millet, praised as "unnervingly talented" (San Francisco Chronicle), has produced a heartbreaking story of the legacy of climate change denial. Her parable of the coming generational divide offers a lucid vision of what awaits us on the other side of Revelation.

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The HSF Podcast List To Get Out of Your Own Head

C R E A T I V E C O N V E R S A T I O N S with S U Z Y M E N K E S

Go behind the scenes with Suzy Menkes, Editor Vogue International at Condé Nast, for in-depth interviews with the fashion industry’s most influential designers, thinkers and executives.

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T H E S A K A R A L I F E

Curated conversations that dig deep into the ancient rituals + modern research we can all use to build lives we love living. Each week, Sakara Life founders, Whitney & Danielle, sit down with today's top physicists, mystics, chefs, healers, + CEOs, to explore the areas of life where science + spirituality coexist + thoughts turn into real, live things. 

New episodes every week // LISTEN on iTunes or Spotify

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T H E G O O P P O D C A S T

Gwyneth Paltrow + goop's Chief Content Officer Elise Loehnen chat with leading thinkers, culture changers, + industry disruptors—from doctors to creatives, CEOs to spiritual healers—about shifting old paradigms + starting new conversations.

New episodes every Tuesday + Thursday // LISTEN on iTunes

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T H E B O F P O D C A S T

The Business of Fashion has gained a global following as thee essential daily resource for fashion creatives, executives + entrepreneurs in over 200 countries.

LISTEN on iTunes

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U N L O C K I N G U S by B R E N É B R O W N

Brené Brown explains Unlocking Us in her own words: “I’ve spent over 20 years studying the emotions + experiences that bring meaning + purpose to our lives, + if there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s this: We are hardwired for connection, + connecting requires courage, vulnerability, + conversation. I want this to be a podcast that’s real, unpolished, honest, + reflects both the magic + the messiness of what it means to be human. Episodes will include conversations with the people who are teaching me, challenging me, confusing me, or maybe even ticking me off a little. I'll also have direct conversations with you about what I’m learning from new research, + we'll do some episodes dedicated to answering your questions. We don’t have to do life alone. We were never meant to”.

LISTEN on iTunes, Stitcher + Spotify

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T H E M O M E N T S T H A T M A D E M E

Roxie Nafousi is one of the most inspirational women out there. Coming from a darker time in her life she has completely done a 180 + has become every girls best friend + the current day self-development QUEEN. Her podcast is a breath of fresh air as she speaks with inspirational individuals, some famous + some not yet all of whom have something incredible to share in the three tops moments that have shaped their lives + the people they have become. I absolutely adore this one + with two seasons thus far, you’re sure to get hooked on the deep human connections made in this one!

LISTEN on iTunes, Spotify + ACAST

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O P R A H’ s S U P E R S O U L C O N V E R S A T I O N S

Awaken, discover + connect to the deeper meaning of the world around you with SuperSoul. Hear Oprah’s personal selection of her interviews with thought-leaders, best-selling authors, spiritual luminaries, as well as health + wellness experts. All designed to light you up, guide you through life’s big questions + help bring you one step closer to your best self.

LISTEN on iTunes, Spotify + Oprah OWN

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R O O M 2 0

The sign above his hospital bed called him Sixty-Six Garage. For more than 15 years, he would lay there unidentified and unconscious. Or so, everyone believed. From L.A. Times Studios + the team that brought us “Dirty John” + “Man in the Window,” comes “Room 20,” a story about the search for a man’s identity + the truth about his accident. Investigative reporter Joanne Faryon’s two-year journey is filled with twists + turns. Now, she'll finally reveal who Garage really is. But one important question remained for her upon this discovery: has Garage been conscious this entire time?

LISTEN on iTunes

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Tools for the (Very Real) Modern Day Woman

I’m not usually one to share in such a personal manner here on Haute So Fabulous. However, today I welcome you into a very imperfect + previously super private part of my life that I’m tired of holding shame around. Shame that has me fearing you might think less of me were you to know how severely “anxiety” + “low moods” have played such debilitating roles in my life.. long before the lockdown reality of 2020. However as I get older, settling into the woman I am + seek to become, I begin to let go of that crippling shame + embarrassment that have only served to weigh me down even further in my experience. I’m here to be real.

“Anxiety” is such a buzz word but for those who know it’s wrath, you know there is no “buzz” + the “band wagon” isn’t exactly the party bus of the century. It’s crippling. It can consume your every waking moment + some nights the precious hope you hold in the possible escape of sleep. These experiences don’t match the fun or fabulous (‘grammable) part of me but, equally, they have played their roles in allowing me grow + evolve into the woman I am today + for that I am grateful.

In finding space to be my entire self in this world + not just the Instagramable elements of an existence, this post is from my heart, in the hope of letting you know that if you find yourself in that dark place too.. PLEASE remember you are not alone, we’re all human + trust me, we really are all just trying to figure it out. Some days are wonderful + even the smallest things like the smell of a fresh coffee can feel exhilarating + even just the noticing of it can be something to be grateful for; those days where you see the light + step into the trust that maybe, just maaaaaybe, it really all is ok. And then there are the days when you can’t even find the energy to look for the switch to turn the light on, despite everyone telling you it’s right there.

Despite my search for it, perfect isn’t a thing. It’s something, in this highly curated world we now live in, that we continuously seek to obtain + ultimately beat ourselves up for in failing to find. We constantly set ourselves up for failure in the search. What if though.. it’s ok to be the real you.. the one you’re figuring out along the way + haven’t yet fully come to know or accept or trust or love. That person who doesn’t just “wake up like this”. On that note of "I woke up like this” - let me remind you, Beyonce has every means to create her life so that she can spend her time exactly where she wishes. Not to belittle her as she’s one of the most incredible, badass women in the world but let’s face it, she isn’t thinking about the trillion errands that need to be completed while also making healthy dinners for her family + actively seeing to every detail of her career. She’s a powerhouse + I love her but we must remember that the cultured thinking of “I woke up like this” isn’t real in the every day life of ANYone.. not even Beyonce.

Refusing to imply or fall for the often marketed message that there’s a magical wand for this stuff, I am constantly seeking NATURAL solutions to this part of me. For what it’s worth, here are some of the things that play such integral parts in creating some inner zen. Health is a collection of choices + actions taken daily + not something to seek overall solutions in any one thing.

What drew me to post all of this was that I’m new to the world of CBD + have been using KLORIS CBD for several months now + although it’s not changed my life entirely, as I don’t believe any one product can alone or should ever promise you, it’s been something I’ve come to appreciate as an important part of calming my anxiety + offsetting the real threat of panic attacks which had become such an issue for me. I was so adverse to trying it as I’m so clean when it come sot anything around ‘drugs’ (I’ve literally never even smoked a joint) but am so so glad I finally did + started here with KLORIS. I highly recommend this brand if you’re new to it all too. You can find them at K L O R I S C B D . C O M

Another things I have to remember is the power of communication. Communicating with loved ones + trying to call it before it gets too overwhelming is beginning to be a real tool for me; something that's a complete work in progress as I hate burdening anyone with my stuff.

Having Supernova WOMAN 01 in my morning smoothie or by itself with water.. EVERY SINGLE DAY without fail! This has truly been a corner stone of my overall health the past 18 months. Read more about my S U P E R N O V A L I V I N G love here..

Chats with + staying inspired by Roxie Nafousi - the ultimate manifesting goddess. I listen to her affirmations + meditations on my morning walks for coffee, alongside attending her online webinars, she has one coming up on Self Love on August 16th. Book your spot at R O X I E N A F O U S I . C O M

Remaining consistent with daily practices + committing to non-negotiable morning + nighttime routines of self care. Doing something once doesn’t cut he cloth + certainly, in my experience of years of trying things once + then deeming them unsuccessful, consistency with anything is what creates an outcome. Wish I’d learned this one sooner but here we are.

Getting outside in nature. Again every damn day. Come hail, rain or shine. I work for myself + some days it’s just calls or Zooms with clients + not face-to-face so it’s imperative that I get out every day.

Exercising daily. It’s simply another non-negotiable for me. Lately I’ve been LOVING M/Body, Melissa Wood Health + Yin Yoga with Phoebe Greenacre. You can see my at home workout list here..

Dipping into the escape of another’s story + the magic of a good book. Watching good movies. You can always find my lists here on the website.. I’m obsessed with sharing movies + books. In fact, here are some links // MOVIES // DOCUMENTARIES // BOOKS

This feels so incredibly exposing to leave these words here; I’m not sharing it to be self-indulgent or to seek validation. It’s simply that I find great strength in reading about other strong women who somehow remain resilient through the lessons life throws their way + wanted to hopefully be some sort of light for even one other human being out there. Remember health is a collection of choices + actions taken daily + not something to seek overall solutions to in any one thing.